goodbye, little one

Apparently I am very behind in blogging, since I haven't posted anything for almost a month! There are a lot of updates and such, and sad news.

Ken and I went to our appointment with the midwife January 10, excited to see baby Cook at 12 weeks. When she found the baby on the ultrasound, it was obvious that something was not right. There was a big lump in the umbilical cord, so she sent me to the hospital this afternoon for a high-resolution ultrasound. Ken and I went to church and our pastor prayed with us, and I think at that time I knew God was preparing me for something. During the ultrasound, I could not see the heartbeat, and when they showed heat/blood flow, there was none on the baby.

We went back to the midwife afterwards, and she told us what we were expecting to hear- the baby had died. It was about 12 weeks, so it happened pretty recently. I was scheduled for a D&C at the hospital January 11 to remove the baby. They sent him/her to pathology to find out if it was a genetic defect, or just a fluke.

Please be praying for Ken and I as we go through the grief process. We were so excited that God had blessed us with a child, and that we weren't infertile. We still look to God, for He knit that child together in the womb, and He can take away what He has created. It is just not our time to have a child. We hope to try in the future.