The Anti-Family Church, pt. 1- Introduction

I've been contemplating this blog series for months now, and have been putting it on the back burner until I could find some time to actually think it through a little more. I figured when I started dreaming about writing the posts it was time to get to it. I'll give you a disclaimer: this may rile quite a few people, which is ok. Before flying off the handle about it, think about whether you're upset because you think I'm dead wrong, or because you're being convicted. Then, if you decide I'm wrong, please give me biblical proof for your side, since I am doing so for mine. It's only fair. :)

The Evangelical world as a majority has been moving away from family church for a long time now, and moving toward seeker-friendly/seeker-sensitive church. Along with that has come the shift towards catering toward man-centered theology, and the idea that "what feels good must be right". In today's society that tends to be the idea that freedom is key, and avoiding family (or family responsibilities) is a perfectly acceptable alternative to raising children and instructing them in the Lord's ways. I have pretty strong feelings against seeker-sensitivity, as I see it as completely against biblical directive.

What as Christians are we to do? Let's take a look at what Jesus says:

"And Jesus came and said to them, 'All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.' " -- Matthew 28:18-20 (ESV)

How do we make disciples? Is it accomplished through a catchy worship service, a neat video, and funny jokes? Is it by giving "life principles" without cracking open a Bible? Do we help disciple people by feeding, clothing, and assisting them without once mentioning Jesus? Do we help our families and children by pushing them into segregated classes once a week to learn about Jesus (maybe) from teachers who themselves may or may not share the same biblical standards as we hold to?

It seems the only effective way to disciple a person is by using the Bible, God's inspired Word, which is the only place we can find the directions for a life dedicated to Him. When we get away from the Truth revealed through the Bible, we move away from God and toward man. Man-centered theology says, "it's all about me, me, me" when really we should only be focused on God, and not what makes us "feel good". Let me tell you, this is an incredibly flawed standard, especially in regards to family, which often does not make us "feel good". Family life is difficult, and as fellow believers we are to uplift and encourage each other. We should be focused on teaching men to be bold men of God, husbands, fathers, and women to be bold women of God, wives, mothers. We should encourage parents to teach their children and raise them in the way they should go.

It would appear that the direction of our society, of which the majority still claim Christian beliefs, is enough to point to the failure of the Church to disciple properly. Where is the accountability, the fellowship, the bold teaching of Truth that angers sinners and uplifts the saints? Have the days of proclaiming Truth and a Gospel so powerful it saves even the most wretched of men passed along with the reformers? May it not be so!

This series will address the areas that I see as needing the most attention in the church in regards to family: men, women, children, and family.

Weslee walking across the living room

O Christmas Tree!

Weslee's first look at a Christmas tree

Ah, a tall tree! After 4 1/2 years of marriage, we finally have a tree taller than 3'! I hit the sales after Christmas last year and scored a 6 1/2' tree for only $10 at Wal-Mart. Go me!
Life at our house is never boring, and putting the tree up was no exception. I had put all the bottom branches on and fanned them out nicely, when I realized the top section just wasn't going on right. Ken, in all his brute strength, tried to force it on a little harder. Instead, the base of the tree that holds the legs snapped, and the tree fell over. I (along with a little help from Ken) spent the next hour super gluing and holding the cracked pieces together in hopes that the tree could be salvaged. That super glue was worthless- it didn't hold anything together except my fingers (I'm lucky I'm not typing with fingers permanently adhered to each other). We tried a little duct tape over the broken pieces, and that held for a couple minutes, but the base still gave way under the weight of the tree.
Finally, in a last-ditch effort to salvage the tree I'd spent so much time putting together, I grabbed the roll of duct tape and started wrapping it around the base. It worked. Half a roll later the tree stood up as straight as it originally had. Afterward, Ken found the tree's warranty (who knew fake trees came with warranties?) and discovered we still have a year left on it, so hopefully they'll send us another base to the tree so I don't have to buy another one this year.
Weslee was in awe at the tree when I showed it to him in the morning. We put it all together while he was asleep- one so he would be surprised, two so he wouldn't get in the way. Hooks and glass ornaments do not mix with the fast little hands of a baby. He just stood and stared at the tree for a few minutes before trying to figure out how to get to it. I'm glad we have a gate to put around it.
I think we'll go shopping this year for a "baby's first Christmas" ornament. Right now we have Ken's first ornament (from 1985) on the tree, since it's for a boy. I'm so looking forward to getting to show Weslee what Christmas time is about. I know he won't understand about Christ's birth this year, but he will get the joy of all the new things happening around him, and that's still pretty cool.
Next on our list is decorating the rest of the house and putting lights up outside (that's Ken's area). This will be the first Christmas we've really had the whole house decked out. I feel like a "real" family now, starting our own traditions that we can follow through the years.

Pumpkin Patch

We had a lot of fun going pumpkin shopping for Weslee's first fall. His pumpkin was the 30lb whopper in the pictures, and he was fascinated with it. This place is "Grandma's" for those who are from the area... there were so many pumpkins there! Ken and I went to a pumpkin patch the first year we were married, but it didn't hold a candle to the size of this one. We liked that it was pretty family friendly, and the prices weren't too bad, either.

First Trip to an Ice Cream Parlor

We took a little family outing one evening to Jem 100, a local ice cream parlor. Weslee was a little young yet for ice cream, but he had some milk while Ken and I ate the good stuff. He seemed to really enjoy all the colors of the ice cream in the display and watching the different people around the place. Hopefully we'll get to go back when Weslee can have ice cream and get some more fun pictures.

Greek Festival (October)

I went with Ken and Weslee to the Greek Festival in Portland for the very first time this year. Talk about an experience! The food, the atmosphere, the Greeks- amazing! We had so much fun hanging out with family and friends, and brought home some pretty tasty treats which were quickly gone. This was the first time we'd really taken Weslee out into a big public place, outdoors, and all bundled up for the cooler fall weather. I think we'll be going back next year, too.

raspberries for dad

Ken and Weslee making raspberries at each other at The Chowder Bowl.

weslee's first beach trip

Dad and Weslee, first time touching sand

First time touching the ocean

Family photo

Trying to comfort Weslee

Enjoying the view from his high chair at The Chowder Bowl

Last Monday we decided to take an impromptu visit to Winema beach, and have a little family adventure. Weslee did terrific on his first longer car ride, and was very excited to see everything when we walked to the beach. The excitement ended the second Ken put him down on the sand. He did not like the sand, and he did not like the ocean... so Weslee is not a fan of the beach just yet. Hopefully when he's a little older he'll enjoy running around and making sand castles. For now, it was a fun experience, and a learning experience for us for future trips. We headed down the coast to Newport after the beach, and had dinner at our favorite place, The Chowder Bowl. Weslee loved the restaurant, and enjoyed watching all the people. Hopefully we'll find more days where we can make little trips as a family.

almost 6 months

Time sure flies. It doesn't seem like it's been half a year since Weslee arrived. Just yesterday we were bringing him home from the hospital and carefully handling our fragile package, right? Our little guy is sure growing! He went to the doctor last week and weighed in at 17 1/2lbs! That's nearly triple his lowest weight- holy cow! He can now sit up on his own, and bear walk (hands and legs straight instead of knees) to move himself across the floor. He tries crawling when he really wants to be somewhere, but much prefers if mom and dad get things for him. He love his feet, and is usually playing with them in some way. Right now he's lounging next to me with his Ellie-Phant in his hands, clapping his feet together like a seal. He's deep in conversation with the toy, lol.
He still doesn't have any teeth that have broken through, but we noticed another little white bump almost where molars should be on the bottom right. Now we wonder if he's going to have a bunch of teeth all come in at once... poor kid.

We're looking forward to the 6-month appointment with the doctor to hear her opinion on how Weslee is doing. He's always been a little bit ahead developmentally. If crawling goes like sitting up, he may be doing it by 6 months. We're excited to see what he's going to do with his first solid food. I found a recipe for homemade brown rice cereal that I'm going to try since it's more healthy than processed white rice cereal.

Hopefully I'll keep up on blogging fairly regularly now that Weslee can kind of amuse himself for short periods of time.

March photos

This is a project we did to make a little footprint for the wall. Ken and Weslee seemed to enjoy it!

some spare time

I noticed that I haven't blogged in almost three months! We've been so busy around here that I just haven't had much time to sit down and write things. So I'll try to give a short update and then hopefully blog on a more regular basis.
We're still working with Weslee on his feeding issues. The tongue clipping didn't solve his latch problem. We recently were referred to an occupational therapist, who has determined that he has a sucking disorder. His muscles aren't developed enough to latch onto a breast, and when he gets tired he has trouble latching onto a bottle, as well. We are doing exercises with him to help him realize that he needs to use those muscles.
Our little boy sure is getting big! At his 4 month visit he weighed 14lbs 6.5oz and was 23" long. He can sit assisted now, and sit unassisted for a few seconds. He also loves to chatter with people. He's a big flirt!
I'm going to post several picture blogs so people can see how he's developed over the past little while. Somebody recently pointed out to me that you know you're behind on blogging when your mom reminds you to write (and my mom doesn't even blog).

surviving the nights

Weslee is now just over 6 weeks old, and he's growing up so fast! He's now smiling at mom and dad and mimicking faces, as well as making little cooing noises when he's talked to. We have been pretty successful in getting him to sleep in his bassinet, but we have a little ways to go before he sleeps in his room. Hopefully we'll get there in the next couple weeks.

I am thrilled to tell you that Weslee is sleeping 4-5 hours a night, which allows me to get a much needed block of sleep. Napping here and there is just not the same as getting hours of sleep in a row. My milk supply finally seems to be keeping up with him, which is good because he seems to have a sensitivity to formula that gives him a nasty diaper rash whenever we supplement. I'm still hoping we'll get the feeding thing down and won't have to do so much if he can learn to latch and feed efficiently.

We have to keep a close eye on our little guy, because he's been able to roll himself over since birth, and gaining weight has not stopped him from being able to do so. Today he rolled over and wiggled his way to mom when I turned to get on the computer. He didn't want to lay on his own, apparently.

I've posted some pictures, but unfortunately haven't been to get a really great one of Weslee smiling. I keep catching the end of the smiles, which isn't very impressive. Hopefully I'll be able to post some more of his cute facial expressions soon.

The First Weeks

We have made it to Weslee's due date (February 15) and the little guy is such a joy to have around. He does the typical baby stuff... eat, sleep, make diapers- but those quiet moments where he is alert and focused on your face are just priceless.

We've been working with his feeding skills since we brought him home, and we continue to see lactation specialists every week to monitor his weight gain and see how much he is eating during meals. Weslee weighed more than his birth weight at two weeks, after having lost about 15% of his body weight in the first few days of life. He continues to thrive and is a voracious eater.

We are so blessed to have such supportive family and friends that have been helping us adjust to this new phase of life. It is certainly different and challenging, but also very rewarding.

Welcome, Weslee!

Our little guy!

Weslee Adonijah Cook made his appearance in this world Friday January 23 at 11:11pm. He weighed in at 6lbs 10oz and 20 inches long. I only labored for 9 hours, after having my water break when I was having lunch with my friend Stephanie at my favorite Thai restaurant. We headed to the hospital and labored naturally until I was 7-8 centimeters, at which point I decided I needed some help. Since I was so far along, I could only get half a dose of a medication called phentanol, which wore off in about 30 minutes. I hadn't progressed so my midwife allowed me to have a little more of the medication, and I was able to concentrate on using the birthing ball to get through the contractions. That dose did wear off during the pushing phase, so I felt all of the pain of the delivery.

I have so much respect for all those women out there who labor naturally, because it is NOT easy! I am so thankful for those who were with me through the labor, and the support they provided. They encouraged me to push through the pain and stay focused on Weslee, and all their effort paid off. Ken was such a wonderful helper, especially. After his initial shock when I went into labor, he was calm and collected and a rock through the whole process.

God has so blessed us with an addition to our little family, and such a cute one at that!